So today was a bit of a challenge. Okay, so was last night. Jonah was up 5 times. I don't know why, so please don't ask. Once he was up for the day he was up. And I mean up. He slept for a total of 10 minutes. Let me add that it was very cold and extremely windy today, so I couldn't take him outside for a walk. David didn't get home until 7 PM. I was dog sitting for my mom's new puppy, Darby (who is adorable). It was a very LONG day. Jonah falls asleep at 8 PM. He wakes up at 8:30. Nurse and back to sleep. Wakes up at 9:20. Nurse, but not back to sleep. I ask Dave to walk him because I am all done for the day. You know that feeling of uter frustration because you don't know what else to do? Yep, I was there.
You know that feeling of being the worst parent on the world because your son cries himself to sleep. Yep, I AM there. He did FINALLY fall asleep, but it was h*#@!!!!!! He is now making the saddest little sobs. It breaks my heart. Every other night he has lovingly been held and rocked until he fell asleep. I hate that he was miserable as he ended the day. I want to go and pick him up and let him know that I love him and that I am sorry that the last 45 minutes happened. I feel sick to my stomach. I know that he wasn't hurting and that he was just mad, but it really doesn't make it any easier. So now I have to try to go to sleep feeling like a horrible person. My poor baby!!!!! :(
Who knows, tonight may be an even worse night - for me!!
bigger hugs
14 years ago
1 comment:
YOU MEAN MOM!! He is going to remember that for the REST of his life. He will hold it against you too! "hey, Mom, remember that night when I was a baby and you let me cry. yeah well that was mean and you didn't love me at all!!" :-)
Hang in there Am...I KNOW it is hard. Do you remember me calling you when I was standing outside Kyle's door because he'd been crying for over an hour and I was sobbing and needed support? I does get better. kyle is 9 and only cries every other night at bedtime! JUST KIDDING. :-)
Don't give us...it will be worthwhile in the end. It is ALWAYS harder on the parent than on the kid.
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